Companions on Global Climate Screwups

tundraAre you guys ready to adapt to new environments? I am! I don’t mean like growing gills and fangs like the aliens of SatIumyne of the vampires of venice episode of Doctor Who. I mean getting ready for new deserts, new oceans, and frozen wastelands! What’s not to be excited about?!

OK, all sarcasm aside. Not to sound like a huge tree hugging hippy but I kind of want to at least be dead before my world decides to delve into a new ice age or a mass Sahara desert. Buuuuuttttttttttt that’s just me.

There has not been one single snow this year on the ground where I live! Not enough to actually play in at all; just enough to slip in a puddle of slush. I am about to build myself a tardis and flee to some moon in another dimension in order to go sledding and make a stupid snow angel!

I of course apologize for bombarding you with all sorts of sarcasm and nonsense. But we need our snow, guys! Going outside with an ice cube and a hammer and smashing up ice cubes is not good enough to call snow!!!!! Trust me! I’ve tried it! It just melted! Our earth is being bled of all it resources! And no one is going to stuff the remaining human race into a spaceship and say sayonara and hope for the best! WE HAVE FUCKED SHIT UP! The doctor is not going to save us, no one is for that matter! We have to be our own companions!

Evil plots unmasked!!!

As companions to the Doctor, we are always looking out for threats to humanity, especially when such threats come in the form of extraterrestrials. After years of research, it now seems that many if not all of the Doctor’s current enemies have temporarily joined forces (not confirmed) to subtly destroy mankind! What’s worse is that they have had their plan in the works for years. It’s hard to believe we are just now connecting the dots: global warming threatens life on Earth.

Thankfully due to help from the Doctor’s many allies on Earth, we were able to catch this before it completely wiped us out! But there is so much damage already done that we will need to work together to help the doctor, to help the earth! Now to prepare us I will share some of the findings from the Doctor’s allies.

First, we believe that the tropical storm Sandy disaster is proof of the upcoming destruction to be expected from the Doctors enemies’ creation Global Warming. Climate warming causes ocean warming, which leads to thermal expansion of the water and sea level to rise. Warm oceans are like jet fuel for hurricanes and hurricanes will have an easier time going further inland due to the risen sea levels. A one-meter sea level rise will increase New York’s severe flooding risk from one incident every century to one every three years.

The doctor’s allies (scientists in this case) agree that global warming has added more moisture to the atmosphere, such that for any storm event, including Sandy, there will be more precipitation as a consequence. And excess rainfall is one of the top three sources of hurricane damage (the others being wind and storm surge).

It is important to note that we do not know every scientific detail related to this elaborate plot as we are not quite up to the Daleks’ intelligence; however there is a vast amount of data collected around the world by the Doctor’s allies and we encourage you to explore these findings as we cannot summarize the entirety of it here.

The Union of Concerned Scientists is our Torchwood 5

Torchwood 5 (under the guise of The Union of Concerned Scientists) needs your help! The Doctor can’t save our planet all on his own, so he enlisted the help of the union. Come join us and your fellow whovians in the fight for Earth!


In their own words, the Union of Concerned Scientists is…

“the leading science-based nonprofit working for a healthy environment and a safer world. UCS combines independent scientific research and citizen action to develop innovative, practical solutions and to secure responsible changes in government policy, corporate practices, and consumer choices.”

Founded in 1969, the Union of Concerned Scientist focuses on putting some distance between science and its use for destroying our planet. By unifying as a group of people from all walks of life, the Union of Concerned Scientists is able to put quite a bit of weight behind their movements, from changing laws to pushing for reforming environmental policies. The union covers a broad range of topics, so they have something for everyone. However, in order to carry out these movements they need your help. Whether it be helping them through funding or volunteering, aiding the Union for Concerned Scientists is a great way to help save our environment!